Getting through the recession
The global recession looks set to deepen. Already many people have lost their jobs and/or homes and more are likely to. Without being too pessimistic it seems obvious that hard times lie ahead. So what can we do to help get through it?
- It’s important not to give in to despair. One of the saddest things I heard recently was about the murder/suicide of a family in the US where the parents had both lost their jobs and so killed their five children and themselves. No matter how bad things get this recession will not last for ever. Like everything else it will pass. Every tunnel has an exit and while at times it might not seem so, the light is there.
- Bravery is not only about momentary heroic responses, such as saving someone from a burning building. Bravery and courage mean facing difficult conditions and demands every day, day in and day out. Most of us have more strength and courage than we think and now is the time to harness them, to manage our own problems and to set an example for family and friends.
- When we have to cope with difficult times we often suffer shock and loss. These are natural and normal reactions and will pass. It is difficult to make decisions and think clearly at such times so others’ advice might help. Sometimes we just have to endure things until we find our perspective again.
- When faced with a serious loss – such as our livelihood or house, panic is often the first reaction. Panic comes from fear and both paralyze us. We are incapable of action, reason, planning or decision-making. It is essential to try to keep calm. But anesthetizing ourselves with drugs or alcohol is not the answer. Taking an emotional step back, as though the problem was someone else’s not yours can help. Making use of all sorts of relaxation and stress reducing techniques will definitely help.
- Stoicism is an underrated quality these days. When hardship strikes we don’t necessarily need to suffer in silence but complaining and bemoaning our fate is counterproductive. This is what life is like – sometimes good and sometimes hard and painful.
- Reality is what it is. When our dreams are shattered, when we lose our life’s savings or retirement funds, job or house, there is no point trying to escape, avoid or deny the truth. Some people for example, after losing their job, simply refuse to open bills and stop paying rent or the mortgage as though if they ignore the problem it will go away. It won’t. Pragmatism and action are needed.
- There are many sources of help available that we don’t often know about. There is no place for false pride. If you need help then it is only sensible to ask for it.
- If money is in short supply (or there is a possibility that it might be) then learning to budget is essential for survival. Expenses must be cut and EVERYTHING should be on the table. You may not WANT to give up an expensive to run car for example, but you CAN live without it.
- If you are doing it tough resist envying those who aren’t. Envy is an insidious emotion that is destructive to morale and motivation. Comparing what we have with what others have is shallow and useless.
- Now more than ever is a time for empathy and understanding. If a friend has lost their job for example, it is insensitive to expect them to go out with you to restaurants say, or to give you expensive presents. On the other hand if you are struggling and your friend is not, then resist resentment. Communication is always good – no one can read another’s mind, explaining our point of view and situation and listening to that of others can only help.
- Negative self-talk is a real demoralizer. If you find yourself thinking things like “I’ll never get another job, If I lose my house I’ll never get another, or, This is a catastrophe” then it is hard to have hope and optimism. Without hope for the future we have nothing. Negatives of all sorts, such as bitterness, resentment, anger, blame, unrealistic “shoulds” and recrimination only white ant your mental, emotional and physical energy.
- Western societies encourage their citizens to value themselves according to their possessions and level of wealth (which helped to get us into this mess in the first place). So when our monetary “value” falls so does our status and sense of self-worth. At such a time it is important to value yourself by other criteria. You are far more than the sum of your money and possessions.
- Shame is a humiliating feeling and many people who suffer financial setbacks feel ashamed. I remember after hurricane Katrina seeing an interview with some people who had made it out of the city safely. They were living in their cars in a car park in another town. Naturally they were distraught but they seemed to blame themselves because they couldn’t provide for their families. They were ashamed to find themselves homeless and jobless. Yet they were totally blameless. Disasters such as this are not personal punishments or judgments from God or whatever; they are not a sign of personal failings or worthlessness. If you have no direct responsibility for what is happening to you then there is no cause for shame or blame.
- If you find yourself with debts you are unable to repay then contact the companies involved and see if you can negotiate lower payments or a payment free period. In some cases declaring bankruptcy is the best option but that decision should not be taken lightly.
- Now is not the time for isolation or for squabbling with family, partners, neighbours or co-workers. The best way through any problem is teamwork. It’s a time for networking, sharing, bartering, helping each other out. Older people who have lived through previous recessions (and worse) should be especially valued and listened to for their experiences have much to teach us.
- When things are tough it’s important to keep up our morale. We don’t have to spend a lot of money. There are many small pleasures that can lift our spirits, recharge our batteries and make life worth living.
- Older generations were taught home and vehicle maintenance, gardening, cooking, dressmaking etc as a matter of course. Younger generations have been taught to do little for themselves – everything is outsourced (which costs money). Now might be a good time to learn to do things that you usually pay others for.
- We can learn a lot from the self-sufficiency movement of the 1970s. For example, it’s high summer here and many seasonal fruits and vegetables are plentiful and cheap, or even free (despite the twelve year drought). In the past couple of weeks I’ve bottled a year’s supply of tomato sauce and relish, apricot and plum jam, and dried, frozen or bottled many other fruits and herbs, enough for our own needs plus plenty to give away or swap. It’s meant being stuck in the kitchen in the hot weather but it’s worth the effort. I’ve saved a considerable amount of money, I don’t have to put up with the artificial colours, flavours and preservatives of commercially produced products, and if I do say so myself, my home produce is far superior in quality to anything I can buy.
- Often, the bleakest times have a silver lining. I know a family who lost their home during the 1990s recession. They had two young children and a hefty mortgage that they could no longer pay when first the wife and then the husband lost their jobs. At the time they were devastated but now see the experience very differently. The wife told me recently, “We’d borrowed far too much, not just for the house but for two cars and furniture and were working every hour we could to pay the debt. We hardly saw the kids and were so tired and irritable that our marriage was rocky. I thought I’d never get over losing my “dream home” but the house I have now is much better and we own it outright and have no other debts. That recession taught us some great lessons, like now to manage money, how to resist instant gratification and what our priorities are – that is family, not possessions. The funny thing is our kids remember that time as one of the happiest. They had us around because we were unemployed. We didn’t have much money but we had each other and we got by.”
The following websites might be of interest:
Get or give free stuff at Freecycle: www.freecycle.org/
Learn how to inexpensively rejuvenate clothing at: http://nikkishell.typepad.com/wardroberefashion/
Learn about living simpler at Ted Trainer’s Simpler Way: http://ssis.arts.unsw.edu.au/tsw/
The following books might also help:
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